"Lonely, I'm Ms. Lonely..."

When I hear this song, I think about the life I left behind to come back home. My mind changed the moment I got on the airplane, but sacrifices are what make us stronger.

Coming home has warped my mind in many different ways. You see things are the same. I have my room. I have my family. I have everything that I left behind the first time I left the nest. But things just seem different. Everything is different. I am different. And as much as I would like things to be the same, they are not the same.

I remember reading "One Hundred Years of Solitude." I always thought of myself as Aureliano Buendia because he was a miserable person with a calling. He was a general for the liberation party in war with a regime. He was a master at his craft, and he left his family to fulfill his destiny. In the end, he ends up making gold fishes all by himself with no real human connections or feelings. All it ever got him was a lack of compassion or real feeling of connection with humanity. I think of myself in that way simply because in the end I am alone. And I may travel the world, I may make all of my dreams come true, but nothing changes that sad fact of life. So for the mean time, I will continue to accomplish as much as I can and know that I am the only one who can do it for myself. So I am lonely. I'm Ms. Lonely.

When I first saw my family, I was speaking to one of my cousins. She mentioned that I looked sad in all of the pictures I took while I was away. I found it completely ridiculous for this person to know anything about how I felt while I was gone. She didn't even ask me what I did over in Honduras, yet she had this understanding that I was miserable while I was away from my family. To be honest with her and you, there are things that make me sad that will never change regardless of the location of my body. I will always have things in the back of my mind that will make me reconsider every single choice I make in my life. But the truth is that I was very happy living my life and doing EXACTLY what I wanted to do. What I found sad at the moment was the fact that this person was living an empty life full of plastic surgery and drama. Yet, I am the one that "looked" sad. Maybe my eyes are just that way and you've offended me. But of course, they can say what they like and I just sit there staring and judging. C'est la vie.

"Devil"- by M. Night Shamylan

Check this trailer out. This movie seems like it has the potential to kill! We'll see if its any good...

Surf the Channel- Another Companion

One of my other companions on this trip is "surfthechannel.com." If anyone knows anything about me, the one thing they would know is how much I love television and media. Growing up and watching The Simpsons, I grew fascinated and obsessed with media. I would literally watch 5-8 hours of television a day, sometimes to the wee hours of the morning. Since it's important to me, I have found a way to keep it in my life.

When moving to Honduras, one of my many concerns was, "What the hell am I going to about television and movies?" Then came the wonderful world of surfthehannel.com. I had heard it from a friend, don't remember who, and so I took it upon myself to find this website where the magic happened. I was not disappointed!

Every movie and television show I can think of can be found in this website. Any documentary, funny item, anything (except "The Devil Wears Prada") can be found. And for every item I see, there is always something interesting to say.

On that note, this marks the first item about surfthechannel.com section. There will be many more commentaries about the website, and what's on it. Check it out and see if you can find your long lost brother!